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Why is my daughter choosing her boyfriend and his family over her own mother?

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Why is my daughter choosing her boyfriend and his family over her own mother?

Postby clay » Sat Apr 07, 2012 9:45 pm

you need to stand up to her.

im 11 yr old and if someone stood up to me i would back off.

if she is rly a nice sweet person she will back of.
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Why is my daughter choosing her boyfriend and his family over her own mother?

Postby leon » Sat Apr 07, 2012 9:47 pm

I didn't read all of that, but the simple answer, is leave her be. At this point in her life, she makes her own decisions. If she wants to be rude and ungrateful, that's her unfortunate choice. Don't try to get her back by paying her bills or buying her stuff. Let her learn on her own. Let her move out. Don't get upset about any of her decisions. Just tell her, "it's your life, live it how you want." Let her be an adult though and in doing so, don't help her out financially AT ALL. Tell her she's welcome to visit you or talk to you, but you wont be funding her. Trust me, it's the best answer.
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Why is my daughter choosing her boyfriend and his family over her own mother?

Postby filbuk » Sat Apr 07, 2012 10:00 pm

She is growing up...Doesnt mean that your her mother does not mean she has to pick you over the family she raised.I know that mother are important because they are the birth giver but that doesnt mean she cant pick over her own family.So what im saying is that she has her own family and she needs to raise her own kids.this is tough to say but im saying "I LIKE MY WIFE SON DAUGHTER" more then my mom and its true because moms sure gave us all birth but that doesnt proove which family is important.
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Why is my daughter choosing her boyfriend and his family over her own mother?

Postby hansel » Sat Apr 07, 2012 10:05 pm

it easy to say as an outsider its not the same for me because shes your daughter not mine.but i think ljet her go support her (not with money) I did the same when i was 17 moved out with my boyfriend (im now 29) i thought he was the best thing ever at the time but when i got older and a little wiser i realised he was a loser . if your daughters boyfriend is not right for her she will find out for herslef . i know its hard to do because you love her and want the best but you ave to do it. she has to make her own mistakes. im dreading my son being a teen (he 11 now) your her mum she will always need you but for now let her go .be there for her support her tell her your worries so its out there so she knows but not in a telling way if u get me? i dont think she is using you on purpose i think she is just used to it. dont pay anymore. if shes old enough to move out shes old enough to pay her own bills. its not being horrible its just a fact of life when you leave home.
hansel
 
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Why is my daughter choosing her boyfriend and his family over her own mother?

Postby achazya43 » Sat Apr 07, 2012 10:10 pm

You know the saying let them go thats what you need to do stop making car payments and stop the cellphone she chose to go with him let her go .She wants to live with a bum who is using her for a meal ticket probably his family is too!She will be back trust me.You know I got married early my mother did,nt care for my husbands family because they were always talking about everyone else but their selves she said they were forflushers.She kind of got mad st me too but this was my new family.I visited her all the time I can count on one hand how many times she came to my house,because we lived at our inlaws but we paid our way.My mother told my sister i was snippy to her i dont know why she said this i know she was getting senile and had dementia well anyways she left her home to my sister, and grandchildren but with the descreation of my sister,so Im wondering my kids will be opt out of that.All my kids have their own cars which they worked for,and their own bills they pay for I have a 3 family home and they each rent an apt from us.If they want to go on their own so be it .They have and always come back My daughter wanted to move out and be on her own she did 3times and came back home she did,nt get along well with others 1 son his wife left him after moving back to our house she had it all planned out.My youngest he went no whereBut they all have jobs. and work and pay their way.When the money runs out she will be back.experience is the best teacher.
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